Waaringa

The scariest thing in my life 2 weeks ago was spending time alone at my mother's house. Not surprisingly, I had an easier and waaay better time than I expected. Even in her absence , it is still my mother's house and I felt safe and loved there. I was also surrounded by family, a comforting and welcome presence. Monday is here; bringing with it new fears and it helps to remind myself 'It's not as bad as you think' Someway, somehow, this will be resolved. This is a pebble, not a boulder, on my path. It shall be well. P.s -Any pointers on how not to overthink are also welcome.

Time really does heal that I can now type the subject without breaking down. Mum was diagonised with Stage IV  rectal cancer in July last year and passed away 5 months later  on 17th December. The days after are a blur, of tasks and visitors, tears and a constant hum of pain in the background. 2019 Christmas was the first without Mum and George - we all unlocked a new  level of pain that day. I'm trudging along , realised  fighting  the tears is a losing battle and when they show  up in public I find a corner or bathroom . This Saturday will be my first time to go home since returning to Kampala last month. Wambui, my sis, was there last week and she couldn't stand it for more than 2 days. Please say a prayer for me. I need it