Waaringa

This morning,as my class 3 daughter was getting ready for school,she recounted a conversation she had yesterday with her classmate Amy. The gist of it was how they hated Luos and ultimately Raila. And it broke my heart. Then made me feel guilty. Amongst the many voices she's been hearing about being Kenyan,  Kikuyu,Kamba or Luo,mine isn't the one that stands out.

I lost my nephew last week. One of the things I noticed is what people say-to console you. Some of them,no matter how well intentioned they are,had me cringing. Here's some of them. i)It's God's will-when I'm in pain,and I've being taught that God is a loving Father,who loves me, I don't want to hear that He wants me  hurting ii)God has a reason-well,I can't see it right now so don't mention it. All I want is raise my voice at Him and question.Don't take that away from me iii)You'll get another child.Really??????This is the most insensitive of them all. Let me mourn. iv)Give it time.Don't even go there As I said earlier,these statements and many others are coming from a good place,a place where someone wants to encourage. Here's what you can say instead i)Pole ii)You're in my prayers and /or thoughts iii)Hugs,if we have that kind of relationship.

Earlier this year,I read Amin  Maloouf's Identity.It's a very compelling and informative read. He says one identifies with the identity that's most threatened.And that explains why I've been feeling more Kikuyu than usual. I needed to take a step back and remind myself that I'm also other persons-mother, daughter,sister,friend,Christian,Kenyan,African,employer,employee,activist and  this helped ground me. To take off the Kikuyu coloured lenses. I love being Kikuyu(don't know any different really)the language,culture(the little that's left of it),history but I will not allow it to define me.

Disclaimer-I thought I'd posted this kumbe I saved it.The sentiments are still valid. It's 0429hrs hrs Kenyan time and have just got home from watching Croatia thrash Cameroon 4-0. In case you didn't know,I'm a football fan,and not those depicted in the FIFA ad,the clueless and admirers. My last football crush was Rigobert Song.And probably the reason why I still passionately root for the Indomitable Lions. Probably,too passionately. In fact,my sister,after seeing how excited and disappointed I get,suggested I pick a team after the quarter finals.Save myself the hyperventilation and near panic and heart attacks.................. Back to tonight's game,I honestly thought Cameroon had a chance,that they's be a worthy opponent against Croatia. Alas,it was not to be. Maybe I should have asked my friend Sach,a brilliant M&E and Research guy  what the odds were. It might have saved me alot of heartache. I was discretely crying after the  third goal and s...

When I feel like I should apologize for being born into my tribe. If the articles floating around and the posts on social media are to be believed, Kenya would be the best country on earth if Kikuyus didn't exist. I grew up in a predominantly Kikuyu neighbourhood. Momanyi  and Awino joined us in class seven,I think, and that was my first close interaction with  a non-Kikuyu.  Awino gave me my first taste of brown ugali and fish. While many of the girls were struggling with pimples,her skin was flawless.And always glowing. High school changed all that,of which I'm eternally grateful. Most of the stereotypes about other tribes were shattered,while some were confirmed. 4 years later,I came out de-tribalised,except whenever my friends would visit or call,my mother would ask what tribe she comes from. And I lived in that bubble for some time.Thinking that tribe doesn't matter,that Kenyans can and should see the only people who benefit from the tribal card are the ...

I was having lunch with a doctor friend of mine and the conversation somehow geared towards violence in relationships,specifically  towards wives. He cited depressing example upon example of the women he treats and counsels. One male patient even beat up the wife while he was admitted.In front of the other patients. The question we couldn't adequately answer is why the women stay in such relationships. Of course there's the usual reasons-status,children,finances,religious and cultural beliefs,stigma etc He kept saying that women are strong-able to endure hardship. But is it really? Is it strength that makes a woman sleep on the couch in her own house as her husband has a one night stand  on the marital bed? Is it strength or stupidity?

A friend told me my posts are short and sometimes left hanging. I agree. My reason is I have a limited attention span and most importantly,I hate giving explanations. I apologize.It's unlikely to change.